This hour of the Limbaugh Wire brought to you by terrorist Limbaugh's "standing O" for Obama's speech
By Simon Maloy

Well, we're back from our overrated vacation and we're ready for El Rushbo to expeditiously negate all the rest and relaxation we accrued over the past week. Much thanks to Greg and Karl for the superlative job they did with the Wire. We're ready to get back to it if you are, but you'll have to forgive us if we're a little slow -- we're still on Ulan Bator time (and we have no idea what we're going to do with all these leftover tögrögs).

Rush got things started by saying it was a "fascinating morning," what with "[d]ueling national security speeches by Fidel Cast -- uh, Barack Obama. We got Castro'd. We got Castro'd by Fidel -- uh, Barack Obama. He just kept going and going and going." Rush said that he'd never seen Obama so defensive, and he enjoyed seeing the "liberals" on the cable networks -- like Lawrence O'Donnell and Bob Beckel -- "foaming at the mouth" over Dick Cheney's speech. The reason they're angry, said Rush, is because Cheney is "effective." Just look at the latest CNN poll on Cheney, Rush advised, which found that his approval numbers have gone up since he's started defending Bush and America. Not for nothing, CNN's polling director said of that very same poll: "Is Cheney's uptick due to his visibility as one of the most outspoken critics of the Obama administration? Almost certainly not."

Rush then declared that Guantánamo is "100 percent" Obama's issue -- you can't argue that it's an issue that extends back to the previous administration, like the economy, said Rush. No, seriously. Rush said that Obama's actions regarding the terrorist detention camp the Bush administration opened and operated has nothing to do with Bush. Anyway, Rush then claimed that the Obama administration is "really not coordinated" on Guantánamo because: "The White House yesterday, Gibbs out there saying, 'Yeah, closing -- our announcement to close Guantánamo was a hasty decision. We're thinking about it.' " That's not true -- Gibbs later clarified saying that he was referring to actions taken by the former administration, not the decision to close Gitmo.

Rush explained that Obama was so "defensive" today because he knows Obama's "personality type." Putting on his Freud hat, Rush theorized: "Barack Obama has accomplished nothing. Barack Obama is where he is because of his perceived brain power. He's perceived to be smart and brilliant, a great speaker, but what's he ever done but organize a bunch of election fraud experts over at ACORN and pal around with some dubious characters? One of his best friends is a terrorist, in fact -- Bill Ayers." Rush concluded that Obama has a "minor messianic complex."

And now, Rush said, Obama is going after waterboarding, calling it "torture." Rush rejoined: "Now, the waterboarding of Khalid Shaikh Mohammed and two others -- just so you remember, folks -- led to the successful obstruction of an attack of the city of Los Angeles. Every one of you in Los Angeles should know that had Barack Obama been president the last eight years, your city would have suffered a nuclear attack. Waterboarding saved an attack on Los Angeles." First off, L.A. was never under threat of a nuclear attack by terrorists -- a statement Limbaugh later corrected, explaining that he "misspoke." Secondly, it's highly unlikely that the waterboarding of Khalid Shaikh Mohammed had nothing to do with foiling the plot on Los Angeles, since that plot, according to the Bush administration, was foiled before Mohammed was even captured.

After the first break, Rush proclaimed that these kinds of speeches from Obama are "getting old" and that he thinks that the economy is "crashing" because of "speeches like this." Declining to explain that one, Rush took issue with Obama's inclusion of snippets of his personal story in today's national security speech: "Obama knows that he's got to fuel it and I am here to tell you, ladies and gentlemen, that only a charismatic demagogue highly skilled in the low art of political seduction would try to weave his personal story talking about his communist parents who both abandoned him by the way, into a discussion on national security." Rush said that Obama's speeches are "dangerous" and "tiresome" and "the height of narcissism." We'll take his word for it on that last one, because if there's anyone who can recognize narcissism ... Anyway, Rush led into the break by saying that if he were a terrorist, he "would have been tempting to give him a standing ovation because essentially Barack Obama apologized to terrorists all over the world for the last eight years of the previous administration."

Back from the break, Rush said that Obama keeps talking about Gitmo as a recruiting tool for terrorists, and we know that waterboarding saved Los Angeles from a terrorist attack (no, it didn't), so he has to ask the people of Los Angeles how effective a recruitment tool an attack on their city would have been. The Rush pointed to a Christian Science Monitor blog post speculating that Obama, in running late today, was "trying to run out the clock" on Cheney and "make it difficult on networks to carry former Vice President Cheney's speech." Rush said this was absolutely correct. We're not so sure this makes any sense, though, unless the cable networks' rumored "no Cheney speeches after eleven" rule is actually real. Anyway, Rush went on to lovingly air a bunch of sound bytes from the former vice president's speech, announcing his full and complete agreement with every statement Cheney made. Rush found the speech to be "compelling," and dismissed the idea that he might be "biased," alleging that his only bias is for love of truth, country, and freedom. After some more Cheney sound bytes, Rush declared that Obama was so defensive today because he's "angry" -- he has a chip on his shoulder and is angry that anyone would dare challenge any decision he makes. Obama has, said Rush, a partisan anger directed at Bush and Republicans.

One more break and Rush came back chuckling that Obama referred to Defense Secretary Robert Gates as "William Gates" prior to his speech today, saying that the teleprompter really "shafted" Obama and "scored one" on the president today. Yes, heaven forbid he should misspeak, like saying Los Angeles faced nuclear annihilation ... Then Rush noted that The New York Times reported this morning that Obama "told human rights advocates at the White House on Wednesday that he was mulling the need for a 'preventive detention' system that would establish a legal basis for the United States to incarcerate terrorism suspects who are deemed a threat to national security but cannot be tried." This, according to Rush, is the studied low art of political seduction. He's telling people that he's going to be righteous, but what he's saying in public is not at all what he's saying it private. He's not what he says he is.

Highlights from Hour 1

Outrageous comments

LIMBAUGH: It has been a fascinating morning, ladies and gentlemen. Dueling national security speeches by Fidel Cast -- uh, Barack Obama. We got Castro'd. We got Castro'd by Fidel -- uh, Barack Obama. He just kept going and going and going. I have never seen President Obama as defensive as he was today.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: Folks, I felt like I was watching a Castro speech, it just -- on and on and on and on and on and on, and it was as defensive as it could have been. Never seen Obama this defensive.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: The perspective that I saw him adopt was as a lawyer making the case for terrorists and having access to the U.S. court system, not making the case for terrorists and their actions.

Don't misunderstand me here. But he almost sounded as one who had to speak up in defense of the terrorists and their legal rights and how those legal rights had been bastardized and destroyed by the previous administration. I have never heard a president in a speech use the word "I" more than Obama did today, and I've never heard a president in a speech use the term "previous administration" more than Obama did today. Now, why was he defensive? I think I know. I know -- I know the personality type. Barack Obama has accomplished nothing. Barack Obama is where he is because of his perceived brain power. He's perceived to be smart and brilliant, a great speaker, but what's he ever done but organize a bunch of election fraud experts over at ACORN and pal around with some dubious characters? One of his best friends is a terrorist, in fact -- Bill Ayers.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: Ultimately, every speech that Obama makes is about him, and this one was no exception. And that's because his followers all have a personal, emotional investment in Obama. Obama knows that he has got to fuel it. But I am here to tell you, ladies and gentlemen, that only a charismatic demagogue highly skilled in the low art of political seduction would try to weave his personal story -- talking about his two communist parents who both abandoned him, by the way -- into a discussion on national security.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: Had I been a terrorist, were I a terrorist, I would have been prompted to give Obama's speech a standing O today. It would have been tempting to give him a standing ovation because essentially Barack Obama apologized to terrorists all over the world for the last eight years of the previous administration.

America's Truth Rejector

Repeated "hasty decision" distortion regarding Gitmo:

LIMBAUGH: Guantánamo Bay is 100 percent Obama. Two days after he takes office, he announces he's going to close it. He didn't have any plan for closing it. His own party says, "No, we're not going to pay for that." "No, we're not going to have terrorists released into the United States," said Dingy Harry. Obama says -- the White House -- Obama White House yesterday said, "Well, it was a hasty decision." They are really not coordinated on this. The White House yesterday, Gibbs out there saying, "Yeah, closing -- our announcement to close Guantánamo was a hasty decision. We're thinking about it." Obama comes out there today defiant as hell -- "Hell's bells, I'm closing the place." It was almost as though he was a lawyer.

Repeated debunked claim that the waterboarding of KSM thwarted an attack on Los Angeles:

LIMBAUGH: Now, the waterboarding of Khalid Shaikh Mohammed and two others -- just so you remember, folks -- led to the successful obstruction of an attack of the city of Los Angeles. Every one of you in Los Angeles should know that had Barack Obama been president the last eight years, your city would have suffered a nuclear attack. Waterboarding saved an attack on Los Angeles. Now, if you're in Los Angeles, you can feel guilty or you can feel grateful, but using Obama's professed techniques and not using waterboarding and other things that he hit hard today, rest assured that we would have not gotten the information that allowed us to thwart a terror attack on Los Angeles. Terrorist attack. Did I say nuclear? Terrorist attack, terrorist attack. I'm sorry. I did -- I misspoke. I'm allowed to misspeak now that I am the former titular head of the GOP.

Clips from this hour

Limbaugh: "Were I a terrorist, I would have been prompted to give Obama's speech a standing o[vation] today"

Limbaugh on Obama's speech: "We got Castro'd"

This hour of the Limbaugh Wire brought to you by the death warrants signed by car czar-in-chief Obama
By Simon Maloy

Kicking off the hour, Rush intoned that wars can not be won with apologies, but that's what Obama did today in his speech when he apologized to terrorists for the Bush administration. Speaking of terrorists, Rush noted that the homegrown terror cell in New York that the FBI busted up on Wednesday night had converted to Islam in prison. So, Rush said, we can bring the Guantánamo detainees to American prisons and keep them from escaping, but what kind of recruiting can they do inside those prisons? Rush expanded on the arrest -- we've seen that Jew-hating extremists (they planned to bomb synagogues) will try to follow through on their threats, so why don't we take Iran's threats seriously?

Rush then explained how it is that he's so accurately able to describe what Obama is and what he's all about -- because he's worked with people who have an "ego" and are "arrogant." And if Obama had not been on the defensive today in his national security speech, Rush said, his reaction to the arrest of the New York terror cell would have been to blame this all on Guantánamo and Iraq, and to understand that America brought it on itself. Rush also said that there's a "countervailing" view that this plot happens to be politically convenient for Obama -- the fact that they're home-grown feeds into the idea that America is to blame. Before he could expand on this particular theory, Rush proclaimed that Obama had "nothing to do" with the arrest, it was the New York FBI.

Then Rush moved on to reports that the Obama administration "gave official backing to an agreement allowing the U.S. to share nuclear technology with the United Arab Emirates, part of his broader push to promote and better manage nuclear power globally." What "frosts" Limbaugh about this, he explained, is that while we're encouraging the UAE to expand nuclear power, the U.S. is exploring windmills and solar panels and taking ourselves back to the Stone Age, and trying to take out the coal industry and big oil.

Then it was time for silly comparisons -- Rush said that there have been 3,444 combat deaths in the U.S. military in the past six years, and then noted that a CNBC columnist wrote that "CAFE kills up to 3,900 extra people each year, a study by Harvard and the Brookings Institition [sic] states. It finds that for every 100 pounds less that an auto weighs, up to 780 more people die in traffic accidents in a year." Rush wondered of the networks will start reading off the names of Americans killed because of CAFE standards. Rush added: "CAFE standards that Barack Obama ordered as a commander in chief would order troops into battle. His decision, the car czar in chief, has just signed the death warrants of thousands and thousands of innocent Americans."

Coming back from the break, Rush wanted to clarify something for his listeners -- he said in the first hour that we had been "Castro'd" by Obama, not "castrated." Then he took a call from a woman who, taking a cue from El Rushbo, said the only person who was castrated today was Barack Obama and Dick Cheney was holding the knife. The caller also praised Cheney's "eloquence" and said that at some point Obama and the liberals are going to have to stop blaming Bush for everything. Rush said she was wrong -- all of this business about torture and closing Guantánamo is designed, said Rush, to set up Bush and Cheney to take the blame the next time America is attacked.

Another break and Rush was back, noting that the Federal Reserve predicted that the recession will be deeper than previously forecast. Rush then asked a question that was "born of simple logic" -- how can economic forecasts get gloomier after the porkulus bill and earmarkulus and auto bailouts were passed? How can the forecast get worse after all of these stimulants? Rush said he still cringes when he thinks of Obama's commencement speeches, saying that college graduates should be encouraged to go out and work and produce instead of working for nonprofits, who are "freeloaders begging for grants." We'd just like to point out at this juncture that the Heritage Foundation, whose work Rush routinely and effusively praises, is one of those "freeloading" nonprofit organizations that college grads should stay away from.

Then Rush had another question -- every time Obama goes out to talk about the economy, do you get the sense he really cares? Not surprisingly, Rush doesn't get that sense. Obama just offers "platitudinous" speeches about a wonderful utopia down the road. There's a way to stop all this economic mess right now, Rush said, and he laid it out in his Wall Street Journal op-ed -- cut taxes, specifically capital gains and the corporate tax rate. As we enjoy pointing out, real economists -- not people who play one on the radio -- think those exact measures are ineffective economic stimulus.

Going into the final break, Rush took a call from a woman attacking Obama for "laughing" when the market tanked earlier in the year, saying that Obama is trying to get even with people who have succeeded. Rush said she's nailed it, Obama wants to return the nation's wealth to its rightful owners. And there's a "personal" element to this, said Rush -- the Obamas were living way beyond their means before the book royalties came in, and liberals care about money as much as anyone else, but liberals like Obama go to Ivy League schools, and they come out of those schools with a deep resentment for the rich.

After the final break, Rush took one more call from a woman who praised Rush for not attacking people as individuals. Perhaps she missed the previous hour of the program in which he expounded on Obama's ego, arrogance, and Ivy League-bred resentment towards rich people, but Rush nonetheless thanked her. The caller then expressed her dismay at the signs of "fascism" she sees here in the U.S. under Obama. Rush said she's not the first person to say this, and others are alarmed that the American people have bought into Obama's proto-fascist regime.

Highlights from Hour 2

Outrageous comments

LIMBAUGH: Now, the liberals told us American deaths -- not just combat but American deaths since the war began, March 19 of '03: 4,296. The combat deaths: 3,444. Thirty-nine hundred deaths on the highways additional because of CAFE standards. Maybe the networks will start reading off the names of those Americans killed as a result of CAFE standards at the end of their broadcasts; CAFE standards that Barack Obama ordered as a commander in chief would order troops into battle. His decision, the car czar in chief, has just signed the death warrants of thousands and thousands of innocent Americans. I doubt they'll get -- families will get letters of condolence. And you might say that this is a sneak attack on the Social Security system. More people get killed in CAFE standard auto crashes, the less you'll have to pay out in the future.

Clips from this hour

Limbaugh: "All of this is to set up blaming Bush and Cheney for the next [terrorist] hit"

Limbaugh claims Obama, "the blame America first guy," "runs around the world" apologizing for America

This hour of the Limbaugh Wire brought to you by the nameless, faceless, true masters of the GOP
By Simon Maloy

One more hour to go, and Rush got it started by saying that someone had emailed him with then observation that even though Obama's speech preceded Cheney's this morning, Obama's sounded like the Democratic response to a Republican president. Rush loved this, said Cheney was the one with the "gravitas," while Obama was "apologizing."

Then Rush patted himself on the back once again, saying that he was the first to predict yesterday that California, in the wake of voters rejecting deficit-reduction measures, would ask for a federal bailout. Rush felt he was proved right in this prediction, largely because of George Will's Washington Post column this morning, titled "The Coming California Bailout," which he read from extensively.

Then it was on to a UK Times columnist's scathing review of the new Honda Insight hybrid. Rush read almost the entire thing on the air, enjoying every minute of it and even translating for his stateside audience a few of the Britishisms it contained. He found it "just hilarious," but said that this is the "crap" that "Obama Motors" is going to be designing for Americans. We can't speak to the automobile expertise or critical chops of the UK Times columnist, but we are confident in the car-reviewing acumen of Edmunds.com, which wrote of the very same car: "Given its impressive talents and attractive price, it's hard to fault the 2010 Honda Insight. Until the next Prius arrives, at least, the Insight is the new ruler of the hybrid-hatchback roost."

After the break, Rush noted that the Treasury Department "will lend GMAC more than $7 billion, a step towards making the company a quasi-federal entity with the power to offer low-interest loans to would-be buyers of GM and Chrysler cars." This makes sense, Rush said, because they're just buying up things left and right, but meanwhile unemployment in Detroit and the rest of Michigan is going up. Go to any blue city or blue state where things are in trouble, Rush said, and you'll find liberal Democrats in charge.

Then it was time for the first of three listener emails, this one from a listener who was mad at Rush for attacking the GOP leadership's inability to capitalize on political "nuclear blasts" like the vote in California on the budget measures. The listener was made because, in her estimation, people like Rep. John Boehner and Michael Steele and Sen. Jeff Sessions are out there fighting for conservative principles. Rush answered by saying that he's not attacking these people. He's not attacking them because "they don't run the Republican Party." At this point, you might be asking yourself: If the House Minority Leader and the RNC chairman aren't leading the party, then who is? Well, Rush had an answer for you ... sort of:

LIMBAUGH: [W]hat you have to understand is that the Republican Party is now being run not by anybody in Congress or the Senate, it's being run by people who don't like the result in California. They don't like a return to Reaganism. They don't like tax cuts as an issue. They don't like social conservatives in the party. They're the Rockefeller blue-bloods. That's why I appointed Colin Powell the leader, the titular leader of the party, because that is the kind of people they are. I don't need to name names, but there isn't a definitive single conservative that has rocketed to the top of electoral Republican politics that is leading the party.

So the GOP is being led by ... people. Shadowy, wealthy people whose names we don't need to know, and who want to control the party's political future through behind-the-scenes puppetmastery. Wait a minute -- could he be talking about ... George Soros? Man, that guy gets around.

After another break Rush read his second listener e-mail, this one a copy of a letter a listener sent to his local Arby's complaining about their preferred parking spaces for hybrid drivers. Rush said this is just a business gimmick, they think everyone is caught up in the environment and they want to capitalize on that. But then a thought crossed Rush's mind - the UK Times columnist who savaged the Honda hybrid wrote that the dashboard of the car "shows leaves growing on a tree when you ease off the throttle." Rush asked us what the fuel for growth for leaves on trees is. Why, it's carbon dioxide, and Rush said that when you slow down your hybrid, you're actually harming the growth of leaves on trees because you're emitting less carbon dioxide. You can stop trying to figure out how that makes any sense. Trust us. It doesn't.

One more listener e-mail to go, this one from a Dittohead who disagreed with Rush's opposition to legislation recently passed by Congress that will "curb fees and limit penalties" on credit cards because the listener was a self-identified "credit-card loser" who needed help with the fees. Rush said this man's real problem is that has no desire to fix the problem he has with credit cards, so he's relying on other people to bail him out.

Then he was on to his final caller for the day, this man calling from his cellphone while he was on the road. Rush asked if he was using a hands-free device, to which the man responded that his wife was actually the one driving. This gave Rush an opportunity to flash that trademark wit: "Your wife's driving? Well, that's not much safer." Anyway, the caller asked when the "misery index" like they had under Jimmy Carter would be revived. Rush said that for a "misery index" to work you have to have people in misery, but people are not going to realize that the economy is bad because the media won't report it.

After one more break, Rush closed out today's program by noting that Eleanor Clift reported earlier this week that the location of the vice presidential "undisclosed location" made famous by Dick Cheney was revealed by Vice President Biden, who said that "the bunker-like room is at the Naval Observatory in Washington." Rush said that if Eleanor Clift got this right, then Biden may have violated the law. And Rush knows this because he's spoken to legal experts, apparently. (Biden's office, by the way, denies this happened.)

That's a wrap for today's Wire. We're glad to be back, though Rush put us through the wringer today, no doubt. We'll be back tomorrow to close out the week. We do hope you'll join us, and we have absolutely no problem disclosing to you the location of Media Matters' less-than-secret Limbaugh Archives, which you're free to thumb through at your leisure.

Highlights from Hour 3

Outrageous comments

LIMBAUGH: But Linda, I'm not attacking any of the names that you've mentioned. I've defended them constantly -- Boehner, Sessions -- but they don't run the Republican Party, Linda, and neither does Michael Steele. Linda, what you have to understand is that the Republican Party is now being run not by anybody in Congress or the Senate, it's being run by people who don't like the result in California. They don't like a return to Reaganism. They don't like tax cuts as an issue. They don't like social conservatives in the party. They're the Rockefeller blue-bloods. That's why I appointed Colin Powell the leader, the titular leader of the party, because that is the kind of people they are. I don't need to name names, but there isn't a definitive single conservative that has rocketed to the top of electoral Republican politics that is leading the party.

Ladies' man

LIMBAUGH: Are you driving hands-free on that cell phone?

CALLER: Oh, no, my wife is driving.

LIMBAUGH: Your wife's driving? Well, that's not much safer.

Clips from this hour

Limbaugh: Boehner, Sessions, Steele "don't run the Republican Party" nor does "anybody in Congress or the Senate"