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Beck calls to "put a time capsule ... in our children" like  the Dead Sea Scrolls

May 27, 2010 10:48 am ET

From the May 27 edition of Premiere Radio Networks' The Glenn Beck Program:

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    • Author by The_Cat (May 27, 2010 10:52 am ET)
      12  
      A time capsule in our children? You mean, like a suppository? Because I don't think you have any more room in that particular spot: it's full of your cranium at the moment.

      Stay away from history, Glenn. It's not your friend.
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      • Author by raine315 (May 27, 2010 11:32 am ET)
        4  
        There is money to made from this! I see $$$$$$$$

        "Survival Suppositories for the Family"!
        What better way to record and save history than on some sort of mini sd card/computer chip in a capsule and then shoved up your child for safe keeping!



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    • Author by timesthree (May 27, 2010 10:54 am ET)
      7  
      Even the people you work with don't listen to you.
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    • Author by soze169880 (May 27, 2010 10:54 am ET)
      9  
      [http://dsfv.schnuerpel.eu/4chan/pedobear/pedobear-seal-of-approval.jpg]
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      • Author by iNova (May 27, 2010 11:43 am ET)
        2  
        Lol. i saw this and just started to bust out crying. This is too funny
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    • Author by ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© (May 27, 2010 10:54 am ET)
      5  
      Beck gets creepier every day. He should be kept away from playgrounds.
      ~
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    • Author by bintx (May 27, 2010 10:54 am ET)
      5  
      I did. I made sure that they got good educations and learned to read REAL history instead of listening to BS like yours.
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    • Author by timesthree (May 27, 2010 10:57 am ET)
      2  
      If you feed your eternal truths and divine truths of our founding documents to your children by way of a capsule (and they would fit in one), your "truths" will finally end up where they belong: the toilet.
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    • Author by David2012 (May 27, 2010 11:01 am ET)
      3  
      What a mishmash of confusion about early church history, and what silliness about the Dead Sea scrolls.

      And is he endorsing heresy here? Because that is what Christian heritage would label the Dead Sea scrolls.

      This little screech, if you actually listen to it, will make your brain spin.

      What an ignoramus.

      If anybody is interested in early church history, I recommend -- in addition to the gospels and Paul's letters -- "When Jesus Became God", "Beyond Belief", "The Gospel of Mary Magdalene", "The Gospel of Thomas", and "The Gospel of Judas Iscariot".

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    • Author by timesthree (May 27, 2010 11:02 am ET)
      2  
      Yeah, you must be a clean vessel, with no prior knowledge, to believe his "truths".


      Hey Becko: I'd like to put you into the back of a cave where no one can find you.
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    • Author by epkklk851 (May 27, 2010 11:08 am ET)
      6  
      Glennie, your history is quite flawed. First off, the Dead Sea Scrolls are Jewish, not Christian, and were dated between 150 BCE and 70 CE. They probably have more to do with the Fall of the Temple at Zion than the Council of Nicea. The First Council of Nicea was convened in 387 CE and was an attempt to settle the disparity of teaching coming from the different Bishops, it led to the creation of a solid doctrine that has allowed the Catholic Church to thrive over the ensuing centuries, it also solidified the Catholic Bible. The two events are disconnected by 300 years.
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      • Author by timesthree (May 27, 2010 11:25 am ET)
        4  
        That doesn't matter to Beck, he just makes up what serves him best. None of his flock will know any better.
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        • Author by epkklk851 (May 27, 2010 11:36 am ET)
          3  
          True, it's a good thing that facts are stubborn, because they stick around even after the average Teabagger has moved on to the next load of bollocks.
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    • Author by papa bear3 (May 27, 2010 11:10 am ET)
      10  
      The average Wikapediot, myself included, is doing a date check, it does not sound right, Dead Sea Scrolls, 150BC-50BC and buried 66-68AD, scrolling......Constantine....the Council of Nicea 325 AD .....yada yada, oh here is the part, "reveals conspiracy to make Puerto Rico a state!"

      wow,
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    • Author by rikntx (May 27, 2010 11:41 am ET)
      3  
      Okay what exactly is the Crazy Man talking about here, putting together a time capsule, planted deep inside the children.

      Ah Crazy Man the historian strikes again. Crazy Man I fear there is already something inside of you that is rotting if not already rotten.
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    • Author by Porkeater (May 27, 2010 11:53 am ET)
      2  
      Dead Sea Scrolls? Council of Nicea?

      He's operating at a sub-Wikipedia level of information, and from the way way extreme conspiracy-theory textbook. Some church historians think Christianity went the wrong way after the Council of Nicea. It was the political assertion that the Christianity of the day would be formalized and followed as a matter of law. Theocratic Christianity. Anybody want that in the US? Other than Beckerheads i mean.

      I think he's mixing up the Dead Sea Scrolls with the Nag Hammadi texts anyway; Nag Hammadi finds like The Gospel of Mary, and Thunder, Perfect Mind record the different Christianities of the early days. The Dead Sea Scrolls, are, in particular, the plans and predictions of a violent overthrow of the Roman Government of 1st Century Israel. Anybody looking at a violent overthrow in the US today? Other than this crook and his followers i mean.
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    • Author by jediknight65 (May 27, 2010 12:12 pm ET)
      2  
      the dead sea scrolls are not recognized by the mormon church
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    • Author by thaneb (May 27, 2010 12:13 pm ET)
      3  
      A time capsule is already in our children--their genes.
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    • Author by Sharpe (May 27, 2010 12:18 pm ET)
      1  
      yes - im sure your words will be of biblical proportions beck. You cant even speak in coherent sentences most of the time and you are going to write an addendum to the US constitution for future generations to have - how about getting a college degree before you write the second part of our constitution? And the hillarious thing about what beck is saying is that, if one of us progressives came out with something so insane, beck would slam it down as trying to re-write the constitution. He claims he loves it but not he feels it needs some supplementary material - please, what a joke.
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      • Author by David2012 (May 27, 2010 12:28 pm ET)
        1  
        Beck doesn't regard the Constitution as a statement of principle or ideas. For him it is a talisman, a totem. Sort of like a luck rabbit's foot or a four leaf clover.

        And the Founders aren't men to him. Their ideas don't matter. They are mythic beings, and merely by using their names as incantations, whatever he says in the same vicinity as their utterance becomes more powerfully true, at least in his head.

        Weird, weird man.
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        • Author by John Paradox (May 27, 2010 7:31 pm ET)
             
          Beck doesn't regard the Constitution as a statement of principle or ideas. For him it is a talisman, a totem. Sort of like a luck rabbit's foot or a four leaf clover.

          Reminds me of the Star Trek episode where a 'parallel planet' was visited with the discovery that one side had a copy of the Constitution.
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    • Author by Don Quixote (May 27, 2010 12:24 pm ET)
      2  
      Jeez, he completely humiliated that girl on his staff and everyone who works for him. What a bunch of doormats.

      And sorry Glenn, our founding documents are ingenious in many ways, and not so ingenious in others (only white male landowers could vote). But they're definitely not divine.
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    • Author by historygeek001 (May 27, 2010 12:46 pm ET)
      1  
      Apparently Beck just heard about the Dead Sea Scrolls and wanted to include them in a conspiracy theory because he thought it would sound scary. Instead, he managed to sound even more insane than usual.
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    • Author by Porkeater (May 27, 2010 1:19 pm ET)
         
      O, i see... we should indoctrinate the children! Because the true wisdom can't prevail on young minds? Or because we have to defy their natural development into mature, liberal individuals? Orrr... because young people are fleeing Glenn Beck and his doctrine in droves?
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    • Author by John Paradox (May 27, 2010 7:33 pm ET)
         
      Is Beck saying we should implant Contac capsules subcutaneously in our children? (to go with the RFID chips we 'get in our vaccinations'?)

      Just sayin'
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      • Author by eweston8542983 (May 27, 2010 10:23 pm ET)
        1  
        Ah, it all becomes clear now.

        Sic'em Tiny Time Pills!
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