Limbaugh Wire: 03/10/2009 Part I
This hour of the
Limbaugh Wire brought to you by America's lost war for the
economy
by Simon Maloy
El Rushbo kicks off the show explaining that 80 percent of the Commerce Department's job is "the weather." He professes his amazement that there haven't been any hurricane forecasts for 2009 yet, but he has it "on good authority" that there will be 500 named hurricanes, 450 of them being major storms. This line of thought was not explained and, thankfully, not pursued any further.
After some extended discussion of Secretary of State Clinton's "gaffes" and how "basic etiquette is missing" from the Obama administration, Rush enlightens his readers by explaining the Employee Free Choice Act in terms everyone can understand: "You are a small business employee. Your boss has a shop that is not union. After this legislation passes, one day, Tony Soprano will walk in with a lead pipe and he will start beating people upside the head to vote to unionize because you cannot vote in private." Now, this is so outlandishly wrong that it doesn't really merit refutation, but what the heck... No. EFCA doesn't do that.
Rush then turns to Warren Buffett's comments on CNBC yesterday morning disagreeing with Obama on EFCA, cap-and-trade, and private jets. According to Rush, Buffett threw Obama and his policies "under the bus," adding: "This is amazing! And no one in the drive-bys is covering this in any way with the weight that it deserves." If by "no one" he means USA Today, The New York Times, the LA Times, Bloomberg, etc, then his point is well taken.
Limbaugh then lumped in Buffett with Barton Biggs of Traxis Partners and CNBC's Jim Cramer (who has apparently lost favor with Rush), attacking them for criticizing Obama's policies, but still supporting his agenda. Rush is convinced that they do this because they're afraid to admit they made a mistake in supporting Obama... or "it's either that or they are afraid of their women at home or they are afraid of the media who will descend on them like the birds in the movie The Birds. They won't even be safe in phone booths."
Saving the best for last, Rush capped off the hour by announcing his intention to cut-and-runTM in the "battle with the economy." He said we could quote him on it... so we will! "Suffice to say, it's around nine minutes to one Eastern Time on March the 10th and I, El Rushbo, proclaim this war is lost. If this is a war, if our battle with the economy to straighten it out and Obama is our general, this war is lost. You may quote me."
Highlights from Hour 1
Outrageous comments
LIMBAUGH: Let me give you an explanation of card check that everybody can understand. You are a small business employee. Your boss has a shop that is not union. After this legislation passes, one day, Tony Soprano will walk in with a lead pipe and he will start beating people upside the head to vote to unionize because you cannot vote in private. Card check is a public vote on whether to unionize.
So they send in a Soprano guy with a lead pipe aimed at your kneecaps or your head and they tell you, "It'd be a good idea if you participated in unionizing the shop." And then after they unionize the shop, they really couldn't care much less about your shop. All they want is your dues to be able to send it to the Democrat Party.
So, when you think of card check, think of yourself as a non-union employee at a small business. You love the guy you work for, maybe you hate him -- it doesn't matter -- and some guy, Tony Soprano, walks in threatening to beat you up on the side of the head if you don't vote to unionize. That's card check brought to you by the freedom-loving Obama Democrat Party.
[...]
LIMBAUGH: All of a sudden now, starting yesterday with Buffett, and moving forward into today, our problem with the economy is the equivalent of a war, right? It's a war. And we have one commanding general and that is Obama. One general, one war. It's a war now. We've got to focus everything on winning the economic war, right?
What time is it? Well, I don't know what real time is, 'cause my clocks are on our delay. Suffice to say, it's around nine minutes to one Eastern Time on March the 10th and I, El Rushbo, proclaim this war is lost. If this is a war, if our battle with the economy to straighten it out and Obama is our general, this war is lost. You may quote me.
"Socialism" watch
LIMBAUGH: Again, I express my frustration over how few smart people actually understand liberalism, understand radicalism. Obama is taking advantage of everybody being distracted by the economy to ram through all these socialist-type proposals that are going to fundamentally alter the basic structure of the country. He's doing it on purpose and these guys think he's just making some neophyte mistake.
He needs to focus on the economy. He's purposefully not focusing on the economy.
Ladies' man
LIMBAUGH: I wonder if James Carville and Paul Begala and Stan Greenberg are even, as we speak, conducting another one of their famous phone polls. I just hear Carville on the phone, "I just have a simple question for you. Yes or no: Do you loathe Warren Buffett? Is Warren Buffett a danger and a risk to America? Yes or No?"
And then the same thing about Jack Welch: "Is Jack Welch a crook? Is Jack Welch a crook or is he a good guy? You tell me right now." And they'll release the polls after they figure out how much damage Welch and Buffett are doing.
Look, we're on a roll here, folks. We may as well stick with this Jim Cramer, who, as you know, I came to his defense yesterday after he expressed stunned shock and dismay that his buddies in the Democrat Party liberal wing would target him and try to go after him. I said, "Jim," and he was dismayed that I would defend him. He's dismayed that people who disagree with him a lot would have one thing in common might come to his defense. So last night on Mad Money -- that's the title of Cramer's show -- he had this to say about me and Obama.
[...]
LIMBAUGH: After saying he agrees with almost all of Obama's agenda, he then trashes it. This is -- you know what we've got here? I'll tell you what we have here, folks. Speaking bluntly, as is the only way I know how, these guys cannot admit that they made a mistake in supporting and voting for Barack Obama. That's what they can't -- that's what they don't have the guts to admit. Not yet, not right now. They just can't make themselves do it.
It's either that -- it's either that or they are afraid of their women at home or they are afraid of the media who will descend on them like the birds in the movie The Birds. They won't even be safe in phone booths.
. . . they are afraid of the media who will descend on them like the birds in the movie The Birds. They won't even be safe in phone booths. --Rush Lintball
Spoken by a man who has never been able to fit in a phone booth.
Please Rush, eat more, and more, and more, then have a stroke. One that leaves your mouth, arms and legs paralized, but your eyes and ears fully operational. We could put you in a room with Barbara Streisand music playing just loud enough to keep you awake 24/7. The music could be laced with subliminal messages speaking of the accomplishments of the Democratic party, the failures of Republicans, and the successful programs started by Liberals.
For a change of pace, we could run Obama's, and Clinton's innogural speeches, and throw in a little Keith Olberman now and then--always with Barbara Streisand music in the background. Then once a month we could have Gary, the gay black intern give you a bath.
Every three months we could strap you in a wheel chair, and take you down to a soup kitchen where those you so despized would have a chance to tell you their stories. You wouldn't be able to shut them up, or have them screened. You would only be able to sit there--forced to listen. Meanwhile, Barbara Streisand music would play in the background.
For entertainment, on Sundays, Mom's, wives, and family members of the dead soldiers would get to visit you and pin their lost loved one's purple hearts and other medals on your bare chest. They could then taunt you for being a "phony soldier."
I sometimes wish I wasn't so kind spirited. Most of what I mentioned is far too good for this phony human.