Good news, fiction fans. Glenn Beck has posted on his website an audio sample from his forthcoming novel, The Overton Window. It introduces us to the super-successful protagonist, Noah Gardner, and describes in painstaking detail the many aspects of his “pretty sweet” life that would make a “killer eHarmony profile.”

After opening up with a Woodrow Wilson quote, Beck's prose begins, offering up one cliché after the next, including the well-worn premise that our young Mr. Gardner, despite notching many romantic conquests, remains unfulfilled.

I made this list after my first listen-through:

“Rounded the corner”

“It takes two to tango”

“Woman of his dreams”

“Frozen in time”

“Lost track of time”

“The game of love”

“He knew right then that he was in love”

Give it a listen for yourselves and find any I missed -- there have to be more.