Did you know that twice every month, for several days at a time (unless it's cloudy), Americans are forced to face a painful reminder of 9-11 every time they look at the night sky?

I'm talking, of course, about the moon, which at the beginning and end of each lunar cycle brashly and insensitively appears to be very similar to a crescent, and the crescent is a symbol of Islam, and all Muslims are to blame for 9-11.

Also, I read on the internet somewhere that some people think Allah is the MOON GOD. Coincidence? Probably! But we just can't take that chance. The moon must be stopped.

And before you dismiss me as a lunatic with too little sense to realize that hunting for secret Islamic shapes hidden in everyday objects as evidence of the creeping Islamic takeover of America exposes only my own ignorance and religious bigotry, consider this: other very serious people are doing the same thing!

Fox News has an entire article treating seriously the complaints of critics who see a suspiciously moon-like crescent in the National Park Service's memorial to the heroes of Flight 93 in Pennsylvania. Blogger Pam Geller, who is not at all crazy, was bragging the other day that she's been intrepidly following this controversy for four years, smartly pointing out that not only is the memorial a crescent, but it sort of points east if you look at it a certain way -- and we all know what's east of Pennsylvania, right?

No, not New Jersey. Ever hear of a little place called MECCA? Deny it if you like, but compasses don't lie.

And let's not forget all the other secret crescents that have been turned up in the logos for the Nuclear Security Summit and the Missile Defense Agency, and in President Obama's hair and face. Where does it end?

If we, as Americans, are going to beat the Islamo-fascist-socialist-communist-Marxist terrorists, then we can no longer allow Muslims to use the moon to gloat about 9-11.