Today was supposed to be the day.

Thursday, March 3, 2011, was supposed to be Day One of the new Islamic order in the United States. The caliphate! It's been five years in the making, and today was to be the “moment” that would mark our descent into Sharia law. That's what Glenn Beck said on Monday, when he warned that the “Sharia 4 America” rally scheduled to happen in front of the White House today was “the moment that I've been saying for five years.”

But, unfortunately, the caliphate ran into some scheduling difficulties.

As Salon's Justin Elliot points out, the rally was cancelled, and the organizer of the rally, one Anjem Choudary, has a habit of announcing controversial events like these, building up publicity, and then backing out. “So the cancellation is not a surprise.”

But as a full-fledged member of the chaotic conspiracy, I'm really hoping that this is merely a temporary setback. So please, Mr. Choudray, the sooner we can get the caliphate going, the better.

Does Saturday work for you? Not too late, though. I have theater tickets.