You know what'll ruin your day like nothing else?

Winning the Nobel Peace Prize.

Time magazine explains, in two separate pieces:

Why Winning the Nobel Peace Prize Could Hurt Obama

Obama's Nobel: The Last Thing He Needs

This is so true. Sure, some people may think finding out you have cancer is the last thing you need. Or that your kid has cancer. But not me. I spend every day of my life grateful that I'm never going to win a Nobel Peace Prize. 'Cause that would really be terrible. It's literally the last thing anyone needs. You know, what with it being the most prestigious award in the entire world and all. Nobody wants that.