This hour of the Limbaugh Wire brought to you by a (sort of) contrite Rush Limbaugh
By Simon Maloy

Earlier this week, we allowed ourselves the luxury of feeling somewhat confident about our NCAA bracket. After last night, however, we're not feeling so high-and-mighty, and now the person running the pool is demanding that we actually pay our entry “voluntary donation.” This seems unfair to us, particularly since he won't accept Deutsche Marks.

Anyway, it's once again “Open Line Friday!” on The Rush Limbaugh Show, and El Rushbo got it started by apologizing. Apologizing for -- wait... what? Yeah, he did. He apologized for saying yesterday of Americans and President Obama: “They know he's lying through his teeth, and they still support him. It just means this -- what women have always known: 'Cheat on me, just don't tell me about it.' ” According to Rush, even though it “was certainly a comment containing a large element of truth, it still perhaps was inappropriate. And so, for that, I apologize.” We suppose that's the best we can hope for from Limbaugh.

Moving on, he told an “old joke” about God, seeing that Notre Dame had invited Obama, “who believes in infanticide,” to deliver the commencement speech, and thus decided to end the world, spreading news of his decision through the major newspapers. The punchline, if it can be called that, was that the papers either buried the story or reported it by highlighting the impact on “women and minorities.” Rush said this joke served as an example of a “template” that media outlets follow when they don't know what to write.

From there, he segued to attacking the “Senate Screw the Budget Committee” for passing Obama's budget yesterday. Limbaugh blamed Warren Buffett, Lawrence Summers, and Christine Romer for not “speaking out” against the spending in the budget, asking “what can they say?” and answering, in a German accent, “we were just following orders.” According to Rush, it's one thing to vote for or support Obama, but to go along with his policies is a “national tragedy.” Why? Because the “ChiComs” are the only check we have left against Obama, and, as Rush has “warned,” if “President Obama succeeds with this, our nation fails.” Rush also repeated Sen. Judd Gregg's (R-NH) outraged statement that the United States, given our national deficit, would purportedly not be eligible for membership in the European Union. As Washington Monthly's Steven Benen pointed out, it's a bogus argument: “The EU offers flexibility to governments that are responding to economic crises -- note to Gregg: we're in the midst of an economic crisis -- and several EU members will run deficits well above 3% this year.”

A quick break and Rush was back, attacking Gallup for reporting that public support for Obama's budget are “hold[ing] steady.” Then it was on to Obama's announcement this morning that he is sending more troops and civilians to assist in Afghanistan, with Rush claiming that the whole announcement was a “feint.” After another break, he explained that it's a “feint” because Obama is “doing it on the cheap.” According to Rush, Obama announcing that he is sending an additional 4,000 troops “doesn't count” as “ramping up” the troop presence, but it allows him to say he's fulfilling a campaign promise. Of course, those 4,000 troops are on top of the 17,000 Obama committed in February. Rush also believed that Obama's Afghanistan announcement was not “political,” but rather based on “intel,” because even though Obama loves “chaos,” he doesn't want the chaos of a terrorist attack.

Rush explained Obama's foreign policy thinking as being borne of a desire to be “part of the whole.” It's not Obama's goal, according to Rush, to “preserve our capitalist system” because Obama actually intends to destroy it: “We are being destroyed from within. We don't need the communists to do it anymore. We don't need to worry about infiltration from foreign enemies. It's being done from the White House. The very structures, the blocks of the foundation that built this country are being dismantled.”

After some more attacks on Hillary Clinton for “blaming America” for the drug violence sweeping across Mexico (we're getting tired of refuting that one), Rush proclaimed the secretary “incompetent,” adding: “The scary thing is she's twice the man Obama is and that illustrates just how precarious our circumstance is.”

Highlights from Hour 1

Outrageous comments

LIMBAUGH: I don't need to apologize for yesterday. I apologized yesterday for yesterday. Ah, that's right, some of you -- if you were listening, ladies and gentlemen, to yesterday's program, the very last comment: I sincerely apologize for it. It's just one of those things.

And I love stereotypical humor and I have a belief that all good comedy requires an element of truth, and while my closing comment yesterday was certainly a comment containing a large element of truth, it still perhaps was inappropriate. And so, for that, I apologize.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: The old joke is this: God is watching The Oprah Winfrey Show, and he's just had it, 'cause he figures the human race -- and then he heard about Obama being invited at commencement speech at Notre Dame. He says, “That's just -- Notre Dame is inviting somebody who believes in infanticide to give the commencement speech? The most anti-life president in the history of the country and Notre Dame extends a commencement invite?” God, watching that and the Oprah show, says it's over. Humanity has failed. I have to step in. I'm going to end the world.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: The only check and balance we have on all of this purposeful irresponsibility is the Communist Chinese because if they refuse to keep buying debt, then maybe something can change this. I have warned you and warned you again. If President Obama succeeds with this, our nation fails. Our nation is unalterably changed for generations.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: We are being destroyed from within. We don't need the communists to do it anymore. We don't need to worry about infiltration from foreign enemies. It's being done from the White House. The very structures, the blocks of the foundation that built this country are being dismantled. The mansions, if you will, of the United States of America's library of freedom are being dismantled door jam by door jam, door by door, brick by brick, floorboard by floorboard.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: I'll tell you what's really scary about foreign policy right now is that Hillary Clinton is incompetent. I mean, incompetent going to Mexico joking about don't drink the water, and then praising them on their environmental advancements, and then on Greta, begging the North Korean communists to call her. The scary thing is she's twice the man Obama is and that illustrates just how precarious our circumstance is.

Clips from this hour:

Limbaugh: Hillary Clinton is “twice the man Obama is”

Limbaugh: Rep. Frank and Sen. Dodd are “toxic congressmen,” “poison members of our government”

Limbaugh: “If President Obama succeeds with this, our nation fails”

"[W]hile my closing comment yesterday was certainly a comment containing a large element of truth, it still perhaps was inappropriate and so for that, I apologize"