This hour of the Limbaugh Wire brought to you by Barack Perón
By Simon Maloy

We watched President Obama's press conference last night, and at various moments, we found ourselves surprised, troubled, enchanted, and humbled -- surprised that the president didn't allow Major Garrett to ask him about the tea parties; troubled that we actually sort of wanted Major Garrett to ask about the tea parties; enchanted by the flawless Half Windsor in Chuck Todd's cornflower blue tie; and humbled by the fact that we found the press conference entertaining and informative, while all the serious people out there were bored to tears. But we have a hunch as to what emotions El Rushbo experienced, and we're pretty sure we're going to be on the business end of a Class 5 Limbaugh hissy fit today.

Well, yesterday, it was Don Obama. Today, it's Barack Perón, as in Juan Perón of Argentina, announcing his “takeover” of Chrysler. This, according to Rush, is “left-wing fascism” like Perón enacted. Then Rush said he hadn't watched the president's press conference live, but he had seen it, and he saw the “surprised, troubled, enchanted, and humbled” question, which he said was what happens with the “feminization of our culture.”

Anyway, Rush wanted to explain to us what was really happening with the Chrysler bankruptcy: it's both a “failure” and a “success” for Obama. Rush said that it's a failure for Obama in terms of “how he sold” his Chrysler plans to the American public because he told us all that the government was the only institution that could save the company. It's a success for Obama because, according to the super-duper top secret plan only Obama and Rush know about, this is exactly what Obama wanted, to turn the auto industry over the unions.

Then Rush explained why he was referring to Obama as “Barack Perón”: because this is “classic Juan Perón-sim.” Well, that at least makes sense in a circular logic kind of way, we guess. Anyway, Rush said what's happened here is that the Chrysler bondholders were “intimidated” into “surrendering their legitimate claims in a bankruptcy.” Intimidated into bankruptcy? From what we read, the reason Chrysler is going into bankruptcy is precisely because the bondholders wouldn't agree to the deal that Chrysler, the UAW, and Treasury all approved: “But the administration said about 40 hedge funds that hold roughly 30 percent of that debt also needed to sign on for the deal to go through. Those creditors said the proposal was unfair and they were holding out for a better deal.”

After the break, Rush asked us to indulge him as he summarized everything he said in the first 15 minutes for the benefit of those people listening on stations that might have carried the president's Chrysler comments instead of Rush's show. So it was Barack Perón all over again. According to Rush, most Americans don't recognize all the nefarious things going on right now because it's never been done in the United States before and is “outside the American political spectrum.”

Then Rush noted that Cessna is discontinuing production of its Columbus business jet, claiming that Cessna has lost its battle with the Obama administration. We weren't aware that Cessna and the administration were locked in combat, and it appears that Cessna wasn't either: “Cancellations are coming from all manner of customers, including wealthy individuals and small corporations. Some customers can't get financing, while others don't think it makes sense to take delivery on a new corporate jet when employees are being laid off.”

Coming back from the break, Rush said that Obama “lied” last night when he cited Winston Churchill's refusal to torture German prisoners during World War II as a reason for why the United States does not torture. Rush declared it an “absolute myth” that the United Kingdom “never, quote-unquote, 'tortured.' ” OK, so let's say that Obama was, in fact, wrong, and the Brits did indeed use “torture” methods on the Germans. We're not so sure that's a particularly effective indictment of Obama or of his intention that the United States disavow those methods.

Then Rush offered yet another analogy for how the country can view Obama. Yesterday, we were all newly married women who realized that our husband was a jerk but just couldn't admit yet that we'd made a mistake. Today, we're older, wealthy men who've married “gold diggers.” So said Rush: “You, who have been victimized by that scenario, you understand what's going on and we can sympathize, because we are being played as similar suckers. We essentially are going for a gold digger -- our sugar daddy.”

Rush then moved on to explaining how Obama's policies are anti-individual because he wants to “remake America.” Into what? Rush asked. Presidents don't get to remake America, because that involves remaking the Constitution, Rush claimed. When a president takes the oath of office, Rush said, “you're not promising to change it.” The Rush asked: What's wrong with America? Why do we have to remake it? What are the flaws?

Back from the break, Rush asked us all to remember “the reason that Barack Obama gave back the Churchill statue.” That reason, Rush said was: “His grandfather lived in Kenya during the colonial days when Britain ran it. And the Brits under -- yeah, I think it was during Churchill's second premiership or prime minister-ship, put down the Mau Mau Rebellion. And Obama's grandfather, Odingo Obama Onyango, whatever, was either killed or severely wounded, and that's why the animists tore Churchill and the Brits in the first place.”

Rush closed out the hour with a caller who explained that the UAW controlling Chrysler is like the fox running the hen house. Rush chastised the caller, saying that you have to separate the UAW leadership from the rank-and-file auto workers. Rush also said that it will be “comical” to watch the UAW board members on Chrysler negotiate with UAW line assembly people on wages and benefits.

Highlights from Hour 1

Outrageous comments

LIMBAUGH: So, after you intimidate lawful bond debt holders, the bondholders, into surrendering their legitimate claims in a bankruptcy -- by the way, to illustrate this again, during the beginning of this so-called crisis in the automobile sector, when bankruptcy was first suggested and proposed, do you remember what the initial rejection to it was? There were two. “Well, no, who's going to buy a car from a bankrupt company? Nobody's gonna do that. Plus, the bondholders would get killed.”

The company wouldn't survive the bankruptcy, and the bondholders, the private sector investor would get killed, remember? That's what happens in a bankruptcy. You're basically telling your creditors, “We're outta there. We're going to reorganize you. You may get some back, but certainly not all of it.”

So that is what precisely has happened here. In -- the lawful debt holders have been intimidated into surrendering their legitimate claims in a bankruptcy.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: This method of bankruptcy and of saving a company by basically turning it over to people who have hardly any investment in it, the United Auto Workers, at the result of an iron fist from the state, i.e. Barack Obama, this is so far outside the American political spectrum -- business spectrum of people -- they can't get their arms around it 'cause they've never seen it before.

And they probably don't know what Juan Perón-ism is; they may not even know who Juan Perón is. They know who Evita Perón is, they think it's Madonna. And they think she was great! So if the Supreme Leader, Barack Perón, succeeds in a lot of this, then we are taking a page out of another dictatorship in our hemisphere no less -- and that would be Argentina.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: One thing, about Obama last night, all of a sudden singling out Churchill as some moral guidepost for not torturing, or being cruel or mean, or whatever you have to do to get information from prisoners.

Don't forget the reason that Barack Obama gave back the Churchill statue. His grandfather lived in Kenya during the colonial days when Britain ran it. And the Brits under -- yeah, I think it was during Churchill's second premiership or prime minister-ship, put down the Mau Mau Rebellion. And Obama's grandfather, Odingo Obama Onyango, whatever, was either killed or severely wounded, and that's why the animists tore Churchill and the Brits in the first place. So this was all -- this all just made up last night. Stolen, used -- it was some left-wing blogger.

“Fascism” watch

LIMBAUGH: Right on schedule -- right on schedule, in a few short minutes, the president of the United States, Barack Perón, will announce his Argentinean-like takeover of Chrysler. Yeah, we don't hear much about Juan Perón anymore -- we hear about Evita. But this is what's happening to Chrysler today. The president's gonna announce it here, according to the schedule, in four minutes. Right out of Juan Perón's playbook. Left-wing fascism coming up for Chrysler.

Ladies' man

LIMBAUGH: The country has fallen head over heels in love with Barack Obama -- blind love, not his policies, but with him. Now I want to give you an analogy here to what's happened. I gave you one analogy yesterday -- that you get married and you know within a month that you've made a mistake, but you don't dare start thinking divorce. I mean, you wouldn't -- and you wouldn't dare tell anybody that “Oh my gosh, I've goofed up here. I can't do this.” So you stick it out.

Well, that's where a lot of Obama voters now are: “I can't believe I” -- but they're not ever going to admit that they think they made a mistake.

Here's another analogy along the same lines, although it does not -- well, it does involve marriage, but -- think of it this way. Any of you guys -- any of you men who have ever been seduced by a gold digger; any of you who have ever been seduced and married a gold digger, you know exactly what is going on right now.

These are the guys who fall for -- they're usually older; they don't have to be. They all have money. They fall for these beautiful, young, sexy women, who they think are ditzes. You know, they think that they're don't -- they're not old enough to have a lot of brains yet. They married 'em and it wasn't long before they got the divorce papers. They lost half of their net worth.

You, who have been victimized by that scenario, you understand what's going on and we can sympathize, because we are being played as similar suckers. We essentially are going for a gold digger -- our sugar daddy.

Clips from this hour

Limbaugh on reported Chrysler bankruptcy: "[l]eft-wing fascism coming up for Chrysler"

Limbaugh on “enchanted” question at press conference: “That's what happens with the feminization of our culture”

Limbaugh on country's “love” for Obama: It's like a man who has “been seduced by a gold digger”