This hour of the Limbaugh Wire brought to you by déjà vu all over again
By Simon Maloy

Rush started off the final hour on the air this week in grand fashion, noting that a significant proportion of the questions submitted for the president's online town hall yesterday were on the legalization of marijuana. Not surprisingly, this turned out to be just another expression of the grand unified conspiracy theory of Obama chaos: “If the American people are ready for the destruction of capitalism, if the American people are ready for the destruction of the opportunity for the American dream, if the American people are ready to vote for an end to their chance to be prosperous, it must mean a lot of them want to sit around and do their doobies. But what's the big disconnect?”

You want more proof of the plan? Get this -- Rush read from a Fox News article on the United Nations' Copenhagen Accord on climate change, which reported that a document “will be distributed to a major environmental conclave next week envisions a huge reordering of the world economy, likely involving trillions of dollars in wealth transfer, millions of job losses and gains, new taxes, industrial relocations, new tariffs and subsidies, and complicated payments for greenhouse gas abatement schemes and carbon taxes.” Noting that the Obama administration has “said it supports the Copenhagen treaty process” if it develops an effective global warming framework, Rush said: “It fits right in, ladies and gentlemen, with Obama's plan to destruct the foundation of capitalism in this country and replace it with a giant government and a huge, huge welfare state.”

So the UN is in on the conspiracy too... And if they're working with ACORN, Google, and the sun, then we don't stand a chance. We're through the looking glass here, people.

Anyhow, back from the break, Rush noted that a CNN journalist and several people were arrested for standing on “dikes” in Fargo, North Dakota. This became an excuse for Rush to say “dike” over and over, to greater hilarity with each repetition. Then it was time for a “very serious” story about “Dingy” Harry Reid. The Politico reported that Reid said Chief Justice Roberts “misled the Senate during his confirmation hearings by pretending to be a moderate -- and that the United States is now 'stuck' with him as chief justice.” Limbaugh linked this to “Banking Queen” Barney Frank's comment that Justice Scalia is a “homophobe,” claiming that Democrats are trying to “intimidate” the conservatives on the Supreme Court because they aren't optimistic that any of the conservatives will retire from the court any time soon. (By the way, the logic behind Rush's theory that Democrats are aware of the fact that Supreme Court justices have life tenure but nevertheless are trying to “intimidate” those justices escapes us.)

After a scintillating conversation with a caller about congressional regulation of the Fed and a quick break, Rush returned to expressing his profound admiration for Daniel Hannan, the European Parliament member who appeared on Hannity last night after attacking British Prime Minister Gordon Brown in a speech earlier this week, calling him the “devalued prime minister of a devalued government.” Rush claimed the speech resonated with Americans because of Hannan's British accent. Noting that Hannan talked (and Hannity lied) about health care in the United States, Limbaugh launched into an attack on Nancy Pelosi, calling her an “airhead” and “stupid.”

Then another caller phoned in, offering Rush his solution to global warming. Rush cut him off, saying that he was committed to “the truth” on this show, explaining: “There is no global warming, so when you say that we have a solution to it, I -- you know, I throw my hands up.” Rush added: “I don't care if there is warming or cooling, there's nothing we can do about it. We're just human beings. There's not a damn thing we can do to cause it or to stop it.” We'll leave it to you to decide who you trust more on the subject: Rush, or science. Anyway, Rush and the caller argued for a bit about ethanol and methanol before Rush offered his “common sense” solution to the nation's energy needs -- just before the oil runs out the oil companies will figure out... something. “That's what they do.” We just have to leave them alone. Sounds like a plan to us!

One more break and Rush ended the show exactly as he ended yesterday's show -- repeating almost word-for-word the “offensive” comments from yesterday for which he “apologized” today. A caller offered to explain her theory as to why people continue to like Obama, saying they're like women who call into radio psychologists explaining why they stay with their abusive husbands. Take it away, Rush: “It's like I said yesterday: 'Cheat on me, but don't tell me. ... Obama can do anything in the world. Just don't tell me what he's really doing, because I love the guy.' He's a cult leader. Battered liberal syndrome: 'Cheat on me, just don't tell me.' ” Presumably Rush will “apologize” for this -- again -- on Monday. All we can do is wait...

And wait, the Limbaugh Wire shall! Be sure to join us again on Monday. We promise we'll be done talking about our NCAA bracket at that point, largely because it'll be little more than a pile of ashes at the bottom of the waste bin. In the meantime, enjoy your weekend, and please check out The World According to Rush, courtesy of your good friends at Media Matters.

Highlights from Hour 3

Outrageous comments

LIMBAUGH: If the American people are ready for the destruction of capitalism, if the American people are ready for the destruction of the opportunity for the American dream, if the American people are ready to vote for an end to their chance to be prosperous, it must mean a lot of them want to sit around and do their doobies. But what's the big disconnect?

[...]

LIMBAUGH: The Obama administration said it supports the Copenhagen treaty process if, in the words of a U.S. State Department spokesman, it can come up with an effective framework for dealing with global warming. In other words, damn the consequences.

If we can claim that it fights global warming, we will do it. It fits right in, ladies and gentlemen, with Obama's plan to destruct the foundation of capitalism in this country and replace it with a giant government and a huge, huge welfare state.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: There is no global warming, so when you say that we have a solution to it, I -- you know, I throw my hands up. There's no solution to it, because there isn't any global warming. And I don't care if there is warming or cooling, there's nothing we can do about it. We're just human beings. There's not a damn thing we can do to cause it or to stop it. We're just prisoners here.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: It's like I said yesterday: “Cheat on me, but don't tell me. Obama can do” --

CALLER: Exactly. So --

LIMBAUGH: “Obama can do anything in the world. Just don't tell me what he's really doing, because I love the guy.”

He's a cult leader. Battered liberal syndrome: “Cheat on me, just don't tell me.”

Enemies list

House Speaker Pelosi:

LIMBAUGH: Nancy, honey, taxpayers are paying for health care. I don't care if it's coming [from] their company, their insurance -- taxpayers -- government health care is taxpayer-paid health care. The government can't pay for anything without taking money from people who produce it, unless they print it, which is sadly what is happening now. The third person in line for the presidency in this country is a complete airhead.